Rules of survival. First is shelter, then water, and finally food. Assessing, planning, and executing skills to survival will keep you actively engaged in the situation to keep you breathing and your heart beating.
Medically for the average healthy adult…. Blood pressure 120/80. Pulse 60 to 100 beats per minute at resting. Breathing rate 12 to 20 breathes a minute at resting. Temperature 98.6F.
Definition of survival: noun; the state or fact of continuing to live in spite of an accident, ordeal, or difficult circumstance.
Definition of acceptance: noun; the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered.
Synonyms of love: affection, admiration, apperication, fondness, yearning, sentiment, devotedness, passion, entanglement, cherish, understandingness.
Keep in mind that some of this (cough, most) is coming from the internet. I wanted to bring this up in light of a reader of mine. I know how hard it is to accept this life. Trust me, I do nottttt have it as together as I seem I do. I write as things come to me. This is very random and personally factual, if that’s a thing. I wanted to address that this reader addressed resentment towards my sailor seeming easy in a way. No, it’s not. I’ve just had time to accept it. I do still resent his choice sometimes and I personally believe it’s okay to SOMETIMES, but not all the times. I do not write about those times because I do not want my readers to think that I am constantly thinking horribly of my dude. I’m not. I am thinking about him sleeping next to me, drool on his face and stealing the blankets on purpose. I do not write about it because I feel that it will enable the feeling of resentment for those new or going into this kind of relationship. I am not saying it’s not okay or not normal. It is so so normal and okay. But it is important, very very important that you learn to accept it. This post is solely directed to those who are the SO’s or those in the military whose SO’s are going through a hard time.
Accept it won’t be easy. Accept it will never be easy. If this were easy, everyone would be in this relationship, in this life, but their not. Only the strong are. Not downing anyone who’s not in a milso relationship. I’ve realized that apart of not wanting to accept this part of your partner’s life is maybe not the ability of your partner. You can cuss me out or tell me I’m wrong, okay, maybe I am. I’ll accept that. Thinking back to my relationship, however, it’s why I started to resent his choice of going into the military. I know his job and I used to think no one could do that kind of work, that no matter how much training anyone had, it couldn’t be done and that… that caused me to resent it. Why would he choose to do something so dumb and stupid and something that could get him hurt? Am I close? Why would he smile and love this job that scares me to death? Am I getting warmer?
Maybe take a step back, take yourself out of the equation for a moment. Put someone(a random name) in your spot and then ask those questions. Why would he do a job that he loves that scares his girl? It’s the same question, just without me/you in the equation. Sometimes taking a step back and trying to think outside of yourself helps you understand difficult situations. For my answer, the one that I came up with… He does it for her. He knows it scares her, but he does it because it (at the end of the day) saves her. He does it so that his family and friends can go to Disney Land or out to eat. He makes sacrifices everyday that sometimes, us SO’s don’t understand outside of our fear. And that’s okay. But he can do it. He’s been doing it and that’s because he’s been trained to do it.
Something you will learn along the way as a SO is fear is part of what keeps us going if you use it the right way. It takes a long time to manage that, I will write about it later. I can tell you that the SO’s sacrifice too. SO’s usually don’t get acknowledged for it, do not expect it.
This life is hard. It will never be easy. The thing is, if you love or want your partner enough, you two will make it work. It will work out. Have faith. In yourself. In your partner. In your relationship. In the training that the military gives them.
You must accept it.